Suicides
I finished reading this book by Nick Hornby the other day, titled A Long Way Down. He is the writer of the novels About A Boy and High Fidelity.
Anyway, the book is about a group of suicidal people who first met on the roof of a building where they planned to kill themselves on New Year's Eve. They ended up coming down from the roof (not by jumping, or there won't be this story) and it went on to tell of what happens after that and how they coped (or not cope).
Reading this book brought upon a rash of questions, what kinda situation is enough to make a person kill himself / herself? What type of personality are the most vulnerable to this type of reaction?
In the book, one of the characters has a disabled son, and she felt that living like that has sucked the life out of her and so she wants to jumps off a building. Another character is a sleazy man who has slept with a minor and went to jail for it, and the result of such disgrace was him losing his job, his family and every ounce of self respect he ever had - and uh, he's also a celeb, so all his indiscretions are widely read about. Another character is a pretty mental 18 year old girl, who wanted to kill herself at the spur of the moment because she happened to be in the area and she couldn't deal with getting dumped by her boyfriend without an explanation (she had also lost a sister, who left home without an explanation and left her car at the side of a cliff - did her sister die or run away?). The final character in that group is a washed up wannabe rock star, whose star faded before it was even born, who was also dumped by his girlfriend.
I've read reviews about the book that says the characters are not real enough, the situation that made them suicidal are not real enough or hard enough, but then again, you think: what the fuck is real?
What is real to one person may be surreal to another, and a situation that is not so serious to one person may be the cause of suicide to another. I mean, there MUST be a person who offed themselves because they couldn't find their black velvet mini dress right? There's depression, prolonged grief, loss - of a job, a family member or a friend, side effects from drug use, loneliness, fear and possibly other stupid reasons.
I feel that each of these characters from the book represent something that everyone (well, maybe not everyone) can relate to. The old lady with the disabled son represents loneliness and never being able to live life as it should be lived, forever being cooped up with someone who probably doesn't even care if she's there or not. The 18 year old, always shooting her mouth off saying the wrong things, alienating others around her and her feeling of abandonment. The sleazy man, who had everything and then by his own doing ruined it all. The rock star with his broken dreams and broken heart.
I'm pretty sure we could relate to either one of them. Who hasn't felt alone, friendless and lonely sometimes? Maybe you're one of those people who say terrible things without meaning it and then regret it later (or not). Or you are one of those who had big dreams, and then life happened and you find yourself getting older and not getting anywhere near achieving that sky high dreams of yours. Or you are one of those you had a great life, and then you fucked it up for a stupid reason and cannot ever redeem yourself.
Each of us I think, we have this inside of us, maybe it's more prominent in some. I know I've felt low enough times to consider suicide, but I could never ever go through with it. I find it hard to think about hurting myself (when you're sober it's much harder) and like a lot of people, death scares the shit out of me.
And because of religion, I am scared of the consequences. But the last thing that stopped me would be leaving behind my loved ones. Killing yourself is definitely the most selfish, self-absorbed act ever - top of the list for sure.
Yet, it still happens. People still murder themselves. If dying is hard, it's even harder to take your own life. We are built to survive, it's our instincts from when humans were first created. Ending life is going against that instinct, going against the rules of the universe.
If there's one thing I've always wondered, is what happens to people while they are dying (from any acts of suicide) - what are their thoughts - damn I shouldn't have killed myself; shit this hurts; why the fuck am I not dead yet?; Erm did I leave the kettle on? and so on. If they don't believe in God would they start believing and praying? Would they change their mind and hope they'll be saved?
Questions questions so many questions...
Anyway, the book is about a group of suicidal people who first met on the roof of a building where they planned to kill themselves on New Year's Eve. They ended up coming down from the roof (not by jumping, or there won't be this story) and it went on to tell of what happens after that and how they coped (or not cope).
Reading this book brought upon a rash of questions, what kinda situation is enough to make a person kill himself / herself? What type of personality are the most vulnerable to this type of reaction?
In the book, one of the characters has a disabled son, and she felt that living like that has sucked the life out of her and so she wants to jumps off a building. Another character is a sleazy man who has slept with a minor and went to jail for it, and the result of such disgrace was him losing his job, his family and every ounce of self respect he ever had - and uh, he's also a celeb, so all his indiscretions are widely read about. Another character is a pretty mental 18 year old girl, who wanted to kill herself at the spur of the moment because she happened to be in the area and she couldn't deal with getting dumped by her boyfriend without an explanation (she had also lost a sister, who left home without an explanation and left her car at the side of a cliff - did her sister die or run away?). The final character in that group is a washed up wannabe rock star, whose star faded before it was even born, who was also dumped by his girlfriend.
I've read reviews about the book that says the characters are not real enough, the situation that made them suicidal are not real enough or hard enough, but then again, you think: what the fuck is real?
What is real to one person may be surreal to another, and a situation that is not so serious to one person may be the cause of suicide to another. I mean, there MUST be a person who offed themselves because they couldn't find their black velvet mini dress right? There's depression, prolonged grief, loss - of a job, a family member or a friend, side effects from drug use, loneliness, fear and possibly other stupid reasons.
I feel that each of these characters from the book represent something that everyone (well, maybe not everyone) can relate to. The old lady with the disabled son represents loneliness and never being able to live life as it should be lived, forever being cooped up with someone who probably doesn't even care if she's there or not. The 18 year old, always shooting her mouth off saying the wrong things, alienating others around her and her feeling of abandonment. The sleazy man, who had everything and then by his own doing ruined it all. The rock star with his broken dreams and broken heart.
I'm pretty sure we could relate to either one of them. Who hasn't felt alone, friendless and lonely sometimes? Maybe you're one of those people who say terrible things without meaning it and then regret it later (or not). Or you are one of those who had big dreams, and then life happened and you find yourself getting older and not getting anywhere near achieving that sky high dreams of yours. Or you are one of those you had a great life, and then you fucked it up for a stupid reason and cannot ever redeem yourself.
Each of us I think, we have this inside of us, maybe it's more prominent in some. I know I've felt low enough times to consider suicide, but I could never ever go through with it. I find it hard to think about hurting myself (when you're sober it's much harder) and like a lot of people, death scares the shit out of me.
And because of religion, I am scared of the consequences. But the last thing that stopped me would be leaving behind my loved ones. Killing yourself is definitely the most selfish, self-absorbed act ever - top of the list for sure.
Yet, it still happens. People still murder themselves. If dying is hard, it's even harder to take your own life. We are built to survive, it's our instincts from when humans were first created. Ending life is going against that instinct, going against the rules of the universe.
If there's one thing I've always wondered, is what happens to people while they are dying (from any acts of suicide) - what are their thoughts - damn I shouldn't have killed myself; shit this hurts; why the fuck am I not dead yet?; Erm did I leave the kettle on? and so on. If they don't believe in God would they start believing and praying? Would they change their mind and hope they'll be saved?
Questions questions so many questions...
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