Half a year
Today marks the sixth month of the quarter and I going out together. I'm not one of those types who would celebrate that ridiculous non-existent ugly sounding word "monthsary" (usually used by Malaysian couples), but I think it's sweet to acknowledge it.
Yesterday the quarter messaged me and wished me, and I told him it's tomorrow. He said he knows, he just wanted to wish me first in case today he forgets because he's currently swamped with work.
Last night as we sat chatting in the balcony, smoking, he mentioned that he is liking me more and more nowadays, now that we know each other better, and it's true that my mood swings and my temper have lessened to an extent.
He told me that at first he doesn't know how to handle me, he said he has never been in a rollercoaster ride in a relationship before (read: I'm a crazy bitch), but he told me I have calmed down somewhat. I think that's good, I think he's good for me.
I have always felt discontent throughout my life, my brain is on a constant battle with my existence..but now, I feel calmer. I have changed.
I went out with him about a week after my anxiety attack scare, when I snapped and told myself I will no longer wait and mourn for my lost first love. The timing was perfect. In a way he healed me.
He told me at first he was scared of just being a rebound, but I know he is not. If he is, I wouldn't be speaking of him anymore at the moment. I don't usually tolerate men for so long, it's very hard for me to like someone enough to go out with them.
I think a lot of women experience this, the older you get, the more men annoy the shit out of you.
I digress.
He told me that between us, when there is just the two of us, we have no problems and we love each others' company. And also the fact that we get along so well and share similar interests. That is why he has faith in the relationship.
The only things that were problems in the beginning were external factors. The fact that he had a crazy ex who could not accept that she was dumped (his mistake for trying to stay friends to pacify her), there was also another ex who should not even be in the picture (dumped last year, but couldn't get over it and she immediately made friends with the more recent ex - lol!) and the fact that I was still legally married at that time (although I was separated for months).
But when all those are settled - my divorce, those two out of the country and out of existence...everything went well. And then there are little things...but I have a feeling those too will be sorted.
I don't know what the future holds for us, and I don't want to hope too much. I have known too well what it's like to be disappointed.
But we'll take it a day at a time. And pray for the best.
Yesterday the quarter messaged me and wished me, and I told him it's tomorrow. He said he knows, he just wanted to wish me first in case today he forgets because he's currently swamped with work.
Last night as we sat chatting in the balcony, smoking, he mentioned that he is liking me more and more nowadays, now that we know each other better, and it's true that my mood swings and my temper have lessened to an extent.
He told me that at first he doesn't know how to handle me, he said he has never been in a rollercoaster ride in a relationship before (read: I'm a crazy bitch), but he told me I have calmed down somewhat. I think that's good, I think he's good for me.
I have always felt discontent throughout my life, my brain is on a constant battle with my existence..but now, I feel calmer. I have changed.
I went out with him about a week after my anxiety attack scare, when I snapped and told myself I will no longer wait and mourn for my lost first love. The timing was perfect. In a way he healed me.
He told me at first he was scared of just being a rebound, but I know he is not. If he is, I wouldn't be speaking of him anymore at the moment. I don't usually tolerate men for so long, it's very hard for me to like someone enough to go out with them.
I think a lot of women experience this, the older you get, the more men annoy the shit out of you.
I digress.
He told me that between us, when there is just the two of us, we have no problems and we love each others' company. And also the fact that we get along so well and share similar interests. That is why he has faith in the relationship.
The only things that were problems in the beginning were external factors. The fact that he had a crazy ex who could not accept that she was dumped (his mistake for trying to stay friends to pacify her), there was also another ex who should not even be in the picture (dumped last year, but couldn't get over it and she immediately made friends with the more recent ex - lol!) and the fact that I was still legally married at that time (although I was separated for months).
But when all those are settled - my divorce, those two out of the country and out of existence...everything went well. And then there are little things...but I have a feeling those too will be sorted.
I don't know what the future holds for us, and I don't want to hope too much. I have known too well what it's like to be disappointed.
But we'll take it a day at a time. And pray for the best.
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